yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
