Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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