i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
