Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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