dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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