they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
