I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
time to smoke my breakfast
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
