hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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