oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I cut my penus on the lid.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
