i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
