I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
