just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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