Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
