where does the pee come out of this thing
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
