the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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