My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
