If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The Olympian is in my bed
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