Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
