Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
