We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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