Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
