we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
