i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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