I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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