its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize