We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
