If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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