just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
