I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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