Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
