And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
