he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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