I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
