where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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