Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
