your room smells of hookers.
And success
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
