One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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