I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I think a kid would responsible me up
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
