another moral hangover. fuck.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
