How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
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