Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
