So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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