Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
