It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
