you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
