We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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