ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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