im drinking this country out of the recession.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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