I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
