Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Damn victory sex feels great
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
